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Bex

Is it likely that I have vaginismus?

Hello everyone. This is an issue that has caused me a great deal of concern lately, but with university I simply have not had the time to get to a doctor and ask about this. I hope I'll be able to find some good advice here.

Firstly, I have never been able to use tampons. I've tried several times over the years but it has always resulted in pain. I've always assumed that I was simply using them wrong and I've just used pads, I never saw it as an issue.

I became sexually active about halfway through last year. When my partner at the time and I attempted to have vaginal sex I experienced a great deal of pain. I believed that the pain was just a byproduct of losing my virginity. We stopped and tried again several times over months but each time he stopped because he was, well, weirded out by the pain.

That relationship ended (which was a good thing, it was a mistake), and by the end of it I'd just sort of decided that the problems were emotional because I hadn't liked him that much etc. So now I'm in a new relationship and I'm attempting sex once again, and I'm having the same problem.

The first time we tried it, it was quite painful and extremely tight, he had difficulty penetrating. I asked him to keep going because I wanted to see if the pain was something I could push past, but it went on the entire time. He gently penetrated further but it took a lot of time.

I keep trying which I know is probably silly, and the pain is the same every time- and the muscles seem even tighter, making it much harder to penetrate.

I've been looking around for things that could explain this and the symptoms of vaginismus seem to fit. So I was wondering if;

A: It's possible that I have this condition and
B: What could be causing it? I know that it can be caused by trauma or sexual inhibitions or things like that, but I haven't experienced any trauma and I'm very comfortable with sex and things. So what I'm really wondering is whether there are physical causes of this and if they're treatable.
admin

First of all, welcome here.
Good on you for finding us Smile

Also, congratulations on your vagina for helping you
get rid of a partner that wasn't good for you last year.
That's what vaginismus is often all about and we should be grateful.

As with your current boyfriend,  your vaginismus may stem from:

a)  same reason as boyfriend number one... see above
b)  the bad experience you had on your first time

i'd recommend you stop trying intercourse right now and
spend some time to browse around the website and forum
cause i know you'll find lots of your answers there and then
we can take it from there.

I'd check the page on Causes. It's called  WHY ME?
in the section for Women.

I'd also check the "vaginismus can be cool!"  article.

Anyway, let us know how things develop for you.
It'll be a good discovery journey, trust us.

Wink
Chalchi

Uhm... I cannot see Bex's text, her post is just saying "This post is awaiting approval by a mod/admin before it will be shown to other users."

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